Forgiveness: When to Let Go
Forgiveness is a personal and sometimes complicated process. While forgiving is often seen as a key step toward healing, it isn’t always simple or the right choice. Research shows that knowing when and how to forgive can make a difference .. sometimes it empowers us, other times it might not be helpful.
The Healing Power of Forgiveness
Studies show that forgiveness can help with personal growth and emotional healing. Being able to let go of resentment can improve both emotional and physical health outcomes, leading to a healthier, more balanced life.
Context of Forgiveness
Forgiveness isn’t one-size-fits-all. It depends on factors like the type of hurt, your relationship with the person, and whether they are willing to change. Forgiving someone for a small mistake or when they show genuine remorse can help rebuild trust and restore a relationship. But if the harm is repeated or the person won’t take responsibility, forgiveness isn’t the best option.
When Forgiveness Isn’t Healthy
Sometimes forgiveness can actually be harmful. Constantly forgiving someone who continues to hurt or abuse you can damage your self-esteem and increase emotional distress. In these situations, protecting yourself, setting boundaries, or keeping distance may be healthier than forgiving. Pressure from others to forgive can also be harmful, it can force reconciliation that isn’t safe or genuine.
The Importance of Self-Forgiveness
Forgiving yourself is just as important as forgiving others. Self-forgiveness means acknowledging mistakes without harsh self-judgment and deciding to move forward.
Practice Strategy
Reflect on the Facts: Look at the situation clearly and objectively. What actually happened, and what was the impact on you?
Analyse the Other Person’s Responses: Consider how the other person has responded - have they shown accountability, remorse, or a willingness to change?
Ask Yourself for Advice: Imagine a close friend told you the same story. What guidance would you give them? This helps you gain perspective and clarity.
Establish Healthy Boundaries: Regardless of whether you choose to forgive, set boundaries to protect your well-being and maintain healthy interactions.
Regards, Brittany x
