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Love's Illusions: Dispelling Relationship Misconceptions

Throughout my therapeutic practice, I've repeatedly encountered and personally navigated numerous misconceptions about adult relationships. Here are some prevalent myths:


Unrealistic Expectations

The notion that a single person should satisfy all your needs is impractical. For instance, even your general practitioner, despite their broad knowledge, refers you to specialists for specific care.


Mind Reading

The presumption that others should instinctively comprehend your needs indicates an attachment wound. While attunement is essential for children, as we mature, we gradually learn to articulate our needs clearly and respectfully.


Conflict Avoidance

Perceiving conflict as inherently negative or a sign of failure is counterproductive. Conflict is vital for communication, self-awareness, and self-actualisation - we are, after all, social beings.


The "Happily Ever After" Myth

The expectation of perpetual bliss can strain healthy relationships. Balance is the essence of well-being - constant connection is not feasible, and we also need others to rejuvenate. It's a matter of balancing the yin and yang.


Equal Division of Labor

The belief that effort in a relationship should always be equally divided is misleading. At times, we can contribute more, at others less. When both parties can only give 20%, the initial step should be to collaboratively formulate a plan of action. It's crucial to remember that it's you and your partner versus the problem, not each other!





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